I’ve been dragging around the edges of this cold when I suddenly realized I hadn’t posted in days. Complete space.
And since I’m still a little spacey I thought I’d go back to the one or two commenter suggestions I’ve got left. (Still working on that mammary one, though, it’s just not gelling. *snick*) I’ve decided to tackle “Embarrassing Moments” courtesy of Andrea. Tackle is actually the right word here because I don’t get embarrassed all that easily. The moments have been pretty rare and as I get older they’ve been even less frequent; I think it’s a combination of better mouth control and just not giving a shit. The times that immediately come to mind fall more under the range of “total humiliating failure” more than your everyday “embarrassment”: both incidences of which involved being pressured as a teen into performing music in public, once with piano and another time with hammer dulcimer. Total. Choke. Some of us aren’t meant to be performers (which real performers never seem to understand!).
So I’ve had to think about this quite a while to come up with some general embarrassing moments. Like the time I inadvertently made a comment about needing a nap after sex. I was at work and I just hadn’t meant to make that comment out loud. In front of my male coworkers who bust out laughing. But still that’s only a five-minute embarrassing moment, you know? Anyway, so I continued to search my fading memory for appropriate examples… and then I remembered THAT TIME.
Picture if you will a young couple in love. I was 19, Keen was 20. He proposed a trip down to
Fast forward a couple of years… by that time (obviously) I was no longer virginally-challenged but I still wasn’t altogether comfortable proclaiming my sexuality to the world. It was “private”. Bedroom matters stayed in the bedroom. Blah blah blah. But of course, I was still curious about all things sex. I just never used the word “orgasm” in group conversations (back then).
So me and Keen are in the
Needless to say with a 19-year-old girl who is still skittish about her sexuality, my face froze into mortified oh-my-god-church-girl horror and I turned and ran out of that den of sexual iniquity. Or rather, the den of horrifyingly embarrassing dildo encounters.
A word of advice, just in case I have any young male readers (doubtful) who are just embarking on new love… don’t shake any dildos at your girl. Especially in public.
Unless she starts it.
- the weirdgirl