Summer Smackdown 2007
You would never know it but I think I was drinking decaf…

Pet My Mangoes

I was planning on writing a thoughtful discussion of perceptions toward advertising in our society… but I was completely derailed when CroutonBoy sent me this (now I can’t get it out of my head):

I think it’s so sweet. Really, just endearing. The wholesome love this family has for each other and Milkior and Boobalar, the openness with which they approach such a natural and beautiful process.  They are a wonderful example of what the world could be if we would just let go of restrictive, old-fashioned ideas. I’m almost certain the girls, having no societal-imposed hang ups over nudity or prudish age appropriateness, will never stop breastfeeding. They’ll grow up strong and smart, without the body-issues and self-consciousness some of us struggle with, and probably will never have any weight problems (because of course when they feel like something sweet they can just chew on ma’s hooters instead of, say, scarfing down cookies (though I don’t think anyone should eliminate all mangoes from their diet – that’s just bad science)).  People the world over will be inspired by these (semi-independent) young women and at long last a movement will take off. The family will tour countries, doing speaking engagements and demonstrations.  Maybe they’ll even start a band, like a modern day Partridge Family in a big happy bus (but perhaps a little more punk – being so DIY), and I bet the La Leche League would be a big sponsor. Their hit singles “Squirt It Sweet” and “Give It To Me, Mama” would take their album platinum.  At the end of the Better Than Mangoes sets mom could step forward and spray the crowd with breastmilk, to wild and enthusiastic screams of approval. Then other women in the audience will feel inspired to lift their shirts, too.  It’ll be just like the free love of the 60s, except it’ll be free titties and drinks for everyone.  (I’m sure none of the women will feel pressured by the movement and that they’ll all want to freely give up their ta-tas to passing strangers, just like I’m sure all those hippie chicks felt good about sleeping around while stoned or intoxicated, not exploited at all.  I mean, in the grand scheme of things what’s a little boob?)  Massive support for breastfeeding will repeal all pesky public nudity or molestation laws.  Better Than Mangoes will be not just a band, but a catchphrase that embodies the essence of a new generation.  Breastfeeding will finally be openly embraced and we will live truly happier, higher-IQ lives.

Yep.

 

All I can say is good thing they didn’t have boys.

     - wg

Comments